Loneliness is a common feeling, but there are steps you can take to help feel more connected. Listening to music, calling a friend, taking a walk outside, and other activities may reduce your sense of isolation.
Loneliness is going around, and it’s having a pretty big impact.
Even before psychological distress and loneliness
Prolonged loneliness can drain you emotionally, making life seem bleak and pointless. It can also lead to physical symptoms, including aches and pains, sleep problems, and a weakened immune response.
Note that loneliness isn’t the same thing as social isolation. You can be alone without feeling lonely. You can also feel lonely even when you’re around other people. Loneliness happens when you feel distressed when you’re alone, while social isolation is the lack of regular interactions with other people.
When it feels impossible to escape feelings of loneliness, these 13 tips can help you navigate them and keep them from wearing you down.
Casting a different light on what it means to be alone may make it easier to navigate feelings of loneliness.
Loneliness happens when your needs for social interaction and human connection go unmet. Different people have different interaction needs, so this doesn’t happen at the same point for everyone. For example:
- If you spend most nights with friends and loved ones, you might feel lonely with just one interaction per week.
- If you prefer being on your own, you might feel perfectly satisfied by seeing one friend each week.
- You might feel lonely upon returning to an empty house, even when you have plenty of strong friendships.
- If you struggle to connect with a live-in partner, you might feel lonely even if you’re often together.
Most people need close relationships in order to thrive. That said, research suggests that some amount of solitude — or quality alone time — is also important. Solitude creates opportunities for self-discovery, creative thought, and self-reflection.
Time alone can also open the door to greater mindfulness, which may help reduce anxiety and depression.
Next time loneliness begins to surface, accept it as it comes. Maybe you put on music and pick up a forgotten sketchpad, flip through old notebooks and rediscover your love of poetry, or simply sit and get in tune with your feelings and personal goals.
Whatever you choose to do, finding ways to make the most of your alone time can help you lean into solitude and use it to your benefit.
It may feel difficult to notice positive things in your life when you feel lonely, but taking a few minutes to practice gratitude each day may help you feel better.
Practicing gratitude can be as simple as thinking of something small you enjoyed recently, like talking to a friend or eating a tasty meal. You can also try to:
- write down a few things you’re grateful for
- remember a few positive moments from your day
- if you feel grateful to someone, tell them about it
- relive a happy experience from the past in your mind
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Music and other sounds aren’t specifically proven to reduce loneliness, but they may still help push it back.
Sound may help fill the space in your environment and thoughts, which can make it feel less overwhelming. For example:
- Music may boost your mood, according to
research , while audiobooks might provide distraction and a temporary escape. - Podcasts and talk radio inform and entertain, and their conversational atmosphere may also help create a sense of connection.
- A favorite TV show or movie can help break the silence in a comforting way, even if you don’t sit down and watch it all the way through.
- Opening a window to hear birds and passersby may help you feel more connected to the wider world.
Even if you don’t see all your friends or family regularly, you can still maintain your closeness.
Sometimes a quick text can seem like the easiest way to connect, but don’t underestimate the power of speaking to another person. A
Simply spending time around others won’t always relieve loneliness. A
The quality of your interactions often matters more than the number. That’s why you might feel lonely in a large group of casual acquaintances but fulfilled by a quiet evening with your closest friend.
How you spend time with others can make a big difference, too. Sometimes, you might just need some company and feel fine watching a movie with a friend or sharing space while working or browsing social media.
When you feel the need to connect on a deeper level, try to find ways to make your interactions more meaningful:
- Share emotions and personal experiences.
- Ask questions, and really listen to what your loved ones have to say.
- Talk about things that matter — work, creative projects, mutual interests.
It’s hard to entirely avoid talking about current events, and you might want to stay informed about what’s happening in the world. Even so, it may help to center your conversations around things that bring you both joy rather than dwelling entirely on distressing news.
